Saturday, 21 July 2012
It's the weekend (yay!) and so I thought I'd follow on from my last post with something a little more light hearted. Thank you to everyone who sent me a lovely message of support and encouragement by the way, and apologies for making so many of you cry!
These are some pics I took a few months ago at an old haberdashery shop near where my parents live. I love visiting as it is full of all those old glass fronted cabinets and shelves upon shelves of ribbons and trims. Tucked around the back corner is a wall of little, tattered, cardboard boxes full of buttons, all arranged in colour order with one of each attached to the front and scribbled out prices in faded pencil
My favourite section, the place I head straight for every time, is full of pretty, pastel coloured trimmings wound around worn-out, cardboard holders. It has guipure lace, cotton crochet and ruffled tulle all a little bit grubby and faded from time. This stock has sat there virtually untouched for the entire 20 odd years I've been going there; it is now officially vintage! I find an excuse to buy a few meters from time to time; it's hard to come by the real deal these days and I so love the way they are displayed
I'd like to tell you that the shop keeper is a plump, rosy-cheeked, smiley lady who sits with her knitting and is keen to help you find the perfect button for your latest project (because that's how it is in my little happy crafting fantasy); but sadly not so, which is a huge shame as I would have liked to chat with her a while and learn about how the industry has changed over the years she has been in business.
I'd like to have chatted about what it would have been like when she first opened and when people made their own clothes and homewares. And what gems the haberdashery salesmen would have offered in terms of stock. I would like to have had the courage to ask her if she'd sell me some of her old stock of guipure lace, cotton crochet and ruffled tulle still on the tatty carboard holders, but in all honesty it woud be like reaching out to try to stroke a rabid dog
The shop is closing this weekend, so I suppose I have lost my chance for a peek into this world of colour-coded, tactile treasures. There is rumour that the whole inventory of stock has been purchased ~ I wonder (read: hope) that a new version of the shop might open and that there will still be somewhere for me to admire all those rows of dreamy haberdashery goodness! And if not, well I'm glad I took these photos and I can always organise my own stock of trims, buttons and notions in the same way!
Goodbye Button Boutique!
Do you have a local old fashioned haberdashery store near you? What's your favourite section there? Is the shop keeper a friendly soul?!
Thursday, 19 July 2012
I have been standing at a crossroads for quite some time; lost, confused and without a sense of direction. I have been able to see far, far away in the distance, a small glimmer of where I think I need to be; I've heard tell of how wonderful it is there but from where I stood there was no obvious route to take, no instructions of how to get that far, no hope that I might ever get there
Over the years I have tried various routes I thought might get me there, only to meet with dead-ends, immovable obstacles and bottomless pits. I have searched high and low for that handy life map other people seem to have been given, wondering how I could have misplaced something so precious; wondering if I ever was given one
I sat; alone, afraid and desperate; watching years pass by and panicking that I was missing everything. I ran and I ran; but what use is running when you don't know how to get where you want to be? I exhausted myself and almost gave up
And whilst lying there, in the dark shadows of unfulfillment, I heard a little voice from deep inside. A voice from inside my heart. It asked me what I really wanted, what my deepest desires were and what life would feel like if I had these things. It told me to trust it and listen to it and believe in it. And I did
Do you remember this post from the beginning of the year about chosing a word to define your year ahead? I chose Clarity and Purpose:
"And this is why I have chosen Clarity as my word of the year for 2012. It is time to get clear on what my destiny is, make some decisions and take some action. I have been wandering aimlessly for too long and life feels too short to live that way
I also have a feeling that once clarity has done its work, the real changes will happen fast and so I am offering myself a second word to use in its place, when the time is right. That word is Purpose. It's time to live life with purpose and on purpose, but first I need the clarity with which to do that "
I hadn't put a time frame around when Clarity would shift to Purpose but on reflection I realise it happened within the first six months of the year. I made the seemingly impossible decision to start a new life for myself in June and the photo at the top of this post is the one I took to mark the occasion ~ I felt it deserved freshly painted toes and my new frock!
I have done a lot of crying; but they are not tears of fear, or confusion, or helplessness, or despair. They are tears of relief, of sorrow and of letting go. Throughout the last 6 weeks of packing up my life and letting go of something/someone so precious to me I have felt calm and secure in my trust that I'm doing the right thing; it's almost eerie. The chatter of doubt and confusion has been silenced and I feel peaceful at last
And so here I am, finally walking with confidence toward those glimmering lights; a skip in my step and a smile on my face. Those stagnant crossroads feel far behind me now and things are moving so quickly I feel as though I stuck out my thumb and have hitched a ride on a bus marked Destiny!
I know I'm finally on the right path; I know because I have clarity as my map and my heart as my compass
Exciting times ahead! I hope you'll join me